New found Yogi

Imagine dangling four feet in the air on a flimsy silk-like fabric as an instructor says “Okay, now fall forward.” Everyone around me dives right in as I second guess the intentions of the exercise (I am a compulsive over-analyzer). As the Antigravity Yoga hammock is tightly wrapped around legs, I let go and plunge to what seems to be a concussion waiting to happen. Surprisingly, my head didn’t even touch the hardwood floor of the yoga classroom, rather my frizzy hair grazing the ground. Sweet baby Jesus! Who would have thought Antigravity Yoga would be this thrilling? So here I am, a freelancer for a local magazine, covering this class as my first ever assignment. (Some of this post is what I wrote in the final article). 

Out of the six Yogi’s in the class, I am by far the curviest. One of my thighs is bigger than two of the instructor’s, who is a petite, understated guy who comes alive while flipping in the hammock and teaching the class. Plastered on a mirrored wall of the classroom the words, “Monitor your Resistance, Trust Your Hammock” are the inspiration to successfully completing an AntiGravity Yoga class at Raffa Yoga Studios (in Cranston, R.I.). This unique yoga practice has been blossoming over the past decade and is considered the quintessential leader in aerial yoga. 

There is no yoga mat needed for this class. Instead, a structural fabric is suspended from the ceiling which is connected from two overhead points. Each hammock is measured to your height to ensure your safety. For a girl like me, I thought there was no way it could hold me up. Skeptical at first, the fabric is a lot stronger than it looks; in fact, each hammock holds up to 2,500 pounds. 

After lighting incense to add to the calming environment, the fun commences. Being upside down was the most relaxing part of the class. The flow of blood rushing to your head creates a zen-like mental state allowing one to become aligned with mind and body. 

The newest position, called the Chandelier, was created by Christopher Harrison, the creator of Antigravity yoga, for pop star Pink. She used the position in her 2010 Grammy Awards performance. I watched her performance before coming to the class and holy shit was it intimidating. There was no way I could do that, I thought, even without the water pouring down on me like she did. (Check out the performance in the link below) 

The position involves a moderate amount of stretching. In order to do the position, the gathered hammock is securely placed above the tailbone with one leg wrapped around the fabric, while upside down. The other leg is bent behind the body while both arms reach and grab the foot. Although it is challenging, the pose pushes the body’s flexibility threshold while stretching the hamstrings and glutes. Holy crampage! My hip abductors got a serious workout. I never realized how little I used those muscles until then. 

Needless to say, if you are thinking about taking the class, do it. It has my stamp of approval. And for the bustier babes, don’t be afraid. However, there were some positions that were KILLING my thighs because it was wrapped so tight. I would say a thinner person would have an easier time contorting their bodies but overall, a great workout and fun experience. I felt like I was in Cirque Du Coleil. I have been trying to get in shape, especially with the new year approaching because if I don’t have a resolution, I’ll feel like a useless human being. At least I can sound ambitious by having some sort of fitness goal. Anyway, the lame, repetitive classes at my gym are losing my interest so this alternative workout is the way to go. Let’s just hope I stick with it. 

No Shame Ladies, Eat On

           It seems as though there is always an inner battle when deciding what after dinner treat I should devour. There are a few questions to consider: Do I eat a second bowl of Vienna Mocha Chip Friendly’s ice cream or go for a healthier option, like the over ripened banana in the back of my refrigerator. After all, I do have a jar of Jif Extra Chunky Peanut Butter that I could smear on it to make it more satisfying. But factoring in I already ate a bowl of ice cream, might as well go balls-to-the-wall and have seconds. What’s the point of eating something somewhat nutritious when I already ruined my 2,000 calorie daily intake? With a smidge of guilt, screw it, give me the gallon and forget the bowl.

         The perception of beauty has drastically changed, and will continue to change as the years come and go. The change in the ‘perfect body’ has always sparked my interest, especially when my body filled out since graduating high school. I once tried out for America’s Next Top Model (I didn’t make the cut) and realized I would be considered a plus size model. For me, coming to that realization was shocking, especially since I was a size five pant for a good portion of my life. So where are we now? As a society, how and why has our idea of what the perfect changed over the past three centuries? My overpriced journalism degree from the University of Rhode Island was in full swing as I investigated this predicament.

          Rewind to the 1800’s when being a plump, pale-skinned, pear-shaped woman was what wooed men. Their sole purpose was to be maternal and nurturing to embody what a good wife should be. Ultimately, marriage was their life goal so flaunting their child bearing hips was their ticket to a perfect life, by the 19th century standards. Corsets were introduced to accentuate women’s full figures that helped achieve the right look to land a man which included wide hips, a big bosom and a tiny waist. In a scholarly journal I researched, Corsets and Conception: Fashion and Demographic Trends in the Nineteenth Century by Mel Davies, she quoted from another scholar that it was claimed “wearing of corsets in England and America was the ‘hallmark of virtue’ amoung the middle classes in the nineteenth century, so much so that the ‘uncorseted women reeked of license; an unlaced waist was regarded as a vessel of sin.” She went on to say “the corset was intended to shape the figure, not merely to fit it” (Davies 620). Contortionists much?

           The 1900’s are what changed it all. Women threw out their corsets and embraced their natural bodies. A new woman was born. She drank, smoked, danced and voted. This woman wore makeup and took risks in fashion. This coined women of the era ‘flappers’. According to Google, the definition is a “fashionable young women intent on enjoying herself and breaking conventional standards of behavior”. In the June 1922 edition of the Atlantic Monthly, G. Stanley Hall described a flapper’s new found appetite among other newfound hobbies and interests.“Those who sell candies, ices, sodas, or 'sweetened wind,' are unanimous that flappers are their best customers. It somehow seems as if they could almost live on sweets; and their mothers complain that it interferes with the normality of their appetites, digestion, and nutrition generally” (Hall 774). That is my kind of lady because anyone who loves sweets as much as I do is a friend of mine. (This probably explains why I am considered a ‘plus size’ model). These women continued to embrace their curvy bodies as their predecessors did. Shameless and independent, women of the 20’s are the cause of my over eating, music chasing, ambitious personality. However, by the mid-20’s, weight was starting to be seen as a part of science with the study of calories and body fat percentages. Models were getting skinnier by the year. Soon, bare-boned models like Twiggy emerged, changing the game forever.

Time Magazine's idea of a perfect body in 1955
     A new millennium brought a new meaning to what being beautiful was thought to be. Celebrities like Britney Murphy, Nicole Richie and train-wreck Lindsay Lohan were pushing the boundaries of being skinny vs. being healthy. In an issue of Time Magazine, they published photos of what they thought to be the definition of a perfect female body in 1955. Compared to models in the 21st century, these busty women look double the size of Kate Moss, for example. Seeing her on the cover of Vogue makes me want to eat a donut for her because of her dangerously borderline anorexic body (before her stunt in rehab). So I can argue that fashion is the cause for our distorted view on women’s bodies. I found a scholarly article titled Gender and Hegemony in Fashion Magazines: Women’s Interpretations of Fashion Photographs by Diana Crane that dissects the reasoning behind our perception of a perfect figure. She claimed that “fashion photographs generate enormous dissatisfaction among women because they create unrealistic expectation that most women are unable to meet” (Crane 541). There was also a study that Crane researched Erving Goffman’s “Gender Advertisements” who said “[such] poses are instantly understood by the public because they represent in an exaggerated manner stereotypical images of women that correspond to the way in which women’s roles are understood in American culture” (Crane 542). Over time, waist sizes were deteriorating making busty beautiful women an unattractive thing. Screw that.

       This blog post probably hasn’t answered my initial question of why society’s perception has changed of a perfect body, but it helped map out the decline of such ideal. I guess it depends on the person’s decision to mimic social norms, however, nothing with stop me from eating another bowl of Vienna Mocha Chip. Sure, I love keeping up with the trending fashions but no model or celebrity can change my thought of a healthy women’s body. Ice cream lovers UNITE!

Corsets and Conception: Fashion and Demographic Trends in the Nineteenth Century. Mel Davies.“Comparative Studies in Society and History”, Vol 24, No. 4 (Oct., 1982), pp. 611-641. Published by: Cambridge University Press. Article Stable URI: http;//

G. Stanley Hall, "Flapper Americana Novissima," Atlantic Monthly 129 (June 1922): 774

Gender and Hegemony in Fashion Magazines: Women’s Interpretations of Fashion Photographs. Diana Crane. “The Sociological Quarterly. Col. 40, No. 4 (Autumn, 1999) pp.541-563/ Published by: Wiley on behalf of the Mid West Sociological Society. Article Stable URI:

One Size Fits Most

       What's better than online shopping? Your favorite store is in the privacy of your own home (or cubical if you are anything like me). It completely eliminates the hassle of rummaging through a crowd of people who may be scouting out the same chiffon blouse as you are. But what happens to the 'one size fits all' garment that doesn't fit? This is my current dilemma.
      With the fall fashions taking over the shopping scene, a pair of essential leggings is a must. But for a woman like me, with a larger behind, the simple task of buying spandex-like pants is quite the endeavor. Typically, 'one size fits all' in a perfect world, is supposed to fit all body types but for some reason, my pear shape doesn't fit into this category. Now what?

       There is nothing like flaunting what your mama gave you but there is something about tight leggings on girls that really grinds my gears, ESPECIALLY when they are sheer. Don't forget ladies, nobody wants to see your downstairs mix up so wear something long enough to cover your 'chuckalina' as Milania Giudice would say.

     Getting the long awaited package from Forever21 is a feeling I am very familiar with, but once you tear through the layers of plastic wrappings and try on the desired leggings that couldn't fit over the butt that was so generously handed down to you (thanks mom), a gigantic let-down starts to sink in. The outfit you had planned for the night is clearly not happening because of the self-conscience feeling that has come over your esteem which stops you from wearing anything remotely form fitting. 

     So once again, I find myself online shopping to find yet another pair of leggings I can wear that doesn't cut off the circulation to my thighs. To be clear, I am not blogging for pity, but for my frustration of sizes that are supposed to fit all. By wallowing on , I have noticed a sling of size zero models that sport the very clothes my size ten self is trying to buy.

       I have recently seen a website that describes their type of leggings as 'one size fits most' which I consider to be very fitting (no pun intended). How does a company dub a stretchy material item as universal when the very clientele that wants to buy it cannot fit into the damn thing? The models used to wear these garments are flawless without any extra fat on their bodies. I was recently told by my roommate that I should celebrate my big booty but I find it difficult when I am faced with the challenge of getting my size. I don't want to have a wardrobe malfunction like Paris Hilton did in a photo I found on

       To conclude, my five hundred plus word rant proves absolutely nothing because I am still online shopping (literally) for clothes girls half my size are modeling. No matter what size, style doesn't care if you can't fit into the desired fashions. Part of the fun of shopping is the chase. Sure, any girl can look cute with an over-sized chiffon blouse with faux leather leggings, but finding the ones that compliment your figure is the challenge. Nobody said being stylish was easy. With a bit of patience and determination, the perfect fall wardrobe can be achieved. 

To Each Her Own

        Well friends, I did it. This is the beginning to a blog that I, along with my twin sister, have created to help break down the confines as to what is thought to being perfect. In a society that focuses on all things perfect, I am here to ground our day dreaming selves back to reality. For the girls who fall in the cracks of being overweight or skinny, flawless or flawed, insane or normal (whatever normal is), I hope to help bridge the gap between the many social stigmas. 

     Why me you ask? Firstly, I have been raised by a ginormous Italian clan who constantly makes me, along with every family member, aware of their flaws. (Out of love of course, right?) My size-ten-pant-wearing-self can be a bit sensitive to the harsh realities of their comments, especially in a culture that revolves around a Sunday dinner table. Secondly, my epilepsy has affected my way of life both mentally and socially. The mentality that comes along as someone diagnosed with a disorder can be extremely disheartening. My social life is constantly dampened because of the sporadic possibility of having a seizure, especially when drinking is involved. I admire every twenty-something year old that doesn’t have to worry about taking pills twice a day.

      I am an emotional eater, selfie loving, hot tempered Italian who needs an outlet to connect with those who been stuck in a limbo of being average, (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing). Everyone has their own perception of what being perfect is. Accepting yourself can only be achieved by embracing the body and mind that were dealt to you. So that is why I am jumping into the never ending, black hole of the blogosphere to help break down the boundaries the word ‘perfect’ has on beauty and everyday life.